The Unprofessional Football League

Adrian Peterson Rips Pec Muscle In Weight Room

Adrian Peterson

The Minnesota Vikings fans have suffered a major loss of hope today as All-World running back Adrian Peterson has injured himself and will miss the entire 2014 season. Peterson tore his left pectoral muscle while attempting an ill advised workout. He was attempting to jump onto the plyometric box at about 48 inches while holding a 70 pound dumbbell in each hand! Now Adrian Peterson is one heck of an athlete, maybe the best athlete in the world. But a feat like that is just plain crazy.

The Vikings head coach commented that he could no imagine what AP was thinking with that stunt. “He knows that he is all we have as far as a real player on this team. Without him, we won’t win four games, and I will likely be on the hot seat come 2015. I don’t need this crap right now,” rookie head coach, Mike Zimmer told reporters. Peterson was obviously distraught after hurting himself in such an ridiculous manner, but he issued a statement through his cousin Larry Archer. “Today I have not only hurt myself, but my team as well. I thought I was doing the right things to get ready for the season, but I guess I went too far,” the statement read.

We put in a call to the hospital and were actually able to get a hold of Peterson for comment. We asked him where he got the idea that he could leap onto a plyometric box with that much weight in each hand. “I heard my old college coach, Bob Stoops who was doing a TV interview, say that I was doing those exercises as a freshman at Oklahoma. It sounded crazy to me, but if coach said I did it I figured that it must be true,” Peterson stated. We were unable to reach coach Stoops for a comment, but did speak to the Sooners’ sports information director, Lisa Redworg, who told us that Stoops was just exaggerating to have a good story for the interview. “Coach Stoops is very sorry that his obviously made up story about Peterson led to this injury. He had no idea anyone would take it seriously, and never thought for a million years anyone would try such a feat of strength,” Redworg told us.

This turn of events is a tragic one for the NFL’s best runner and for the Vikings. But hopefully we can learn something from the situation. We have to take what athletes and coaches say in interviews with a grain of salt. If their little stories sound to fantastic to be true, then they likely are just that.

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